And for all the in between years

Ol’ Blue Eyes says in one of his most beloved songs, “When somebody needs you/it’s no good unless she needs you all the way/through the good or lean years/and for all the in between years come what may.”

I’ve loved Sinatra since I was about 12 years old, and now more than ever, his songs have so much meaning in my life. In the last two months, I’ve ended a four-year relationship with someone whom I loved more than anyone, “broken up” with a friend that I’ve known for 13 years, and started to truly understand after nearly 26 years what it means to love or be loved “all the way.”

These are the in between years for me. Technically, I hope it’s only months, or maybe a year or two max. But it’s neither a good or lean year – it’s just that  – in between. New opportunities at work, new people in my life, old people moving out of my life, and my parents perhaps moving across the country and the state I called “home” will no longer be such. In the next year or two, I may  move again myself, I may change jobs,  and I may or may not fall in love again. There will be drama, there will be hugs, and kisses, and crying, and hopefully lots of laughter. There will be moments when I just want to hide by myself and tell everyone to go away and leave me alone, and there will be days where all I want is someone to wrap their arms around me and never let go. There will be people who call me too often, too little, or not at all. I will call people too often, too little, or not at all.

These are my in between years. Who knows where the road will lead us? Only a fool will say. But whatever it is, and wherever it is, I will do it all the way.

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What is it that makes you YOU?

We’ve all heard this question over the years, or variations of it. What makes you different from everyone else? What makes you most you? Write an acrostic with each letter of your name starting a word that describes you…and so forth.

Well tonight I was reminded of that question. It wasn’t from a teacher or a counselor or even a prospective employer. It was from a friend, but it was right on. I’m at a point where I’m learning my way around in my profession, at my place of work, in this city, in my relationships. There are plenty of people just a few years older than me that are the “go-to” for a particular subject – because they own it and know it inside out and they have really made a name for themselves on it. I can say I know a lot about corgis, or Cajun cooking, or Jane Austen books or Frank Sinatra, but I’m still trying to figure out what that one interest area is that I want to work on for years and years as a job, as a passion – that people will come to me for. We all want to be recognized for something we know, right?

What is the area you feel you want to be the go-to for? What will you do to get to that point?