There are hundreds of books and audio tapes and sermons and suggestions out there on how to get what you really want…how to succeed in business…how to get the love you want, etc. Pretty much anything you want or need, there is something out there for you on how to get there. Except maybe more time. Because we can’t ever get more time – time is what it is.
But without reading all the books and sermons and pamphlets and attending all the conferences and seminars, the bottom line is that to get what you want, YOU NEED TO ASK FOR IT. This applies to all facets of your life. Some examples:
Work
- If you think you deserve a raise, title change, promotion, or more benefits, you won’t always be lucky enough to have it handed to you. You might have to make a case for it. And even if you don’t get it, it will be noticed that you went for it, and that might make a difference to start.
- If something is missing at your office, whether it’s a team dynamic that needs to change, an HR issue, or you think there isn’t enough budget for office supplies, put in the request. Do the research, put together a one-page memo, and pitch it to the boss. You might be surprised at how quickly the answer is yes.
Business & Customer Service
- We often feel we have to settle for the room the hotel gives us, the price the cable guy sets, or the menu item as the restaurant sets it. But more often than not, businesses and retailers engaged in customer service will offer you what you need, as long as it’s not outrageous. So ask for the discount, ask for the upgraded room, negotiate the rent, and swap the ingredients. If you’re polite and make a request, not a demand, the person on the other end of the counter/phone is more likely to help you. The “what can you do for me?” line really DOES work.
Relationships
- My parents tell it to me all the time these days: tell us what you need from us. Unless I ask them for something, whether it’s guidance, financial assistance, or to give me space, they don’t know I need it.
- It works both ways: you don’t know how to be a good friend/girlfriend/sister/daughter if you don’t put the question out there to your friends and family on what they need from YOU.
- This falls under the work bucket as well, but it’s more personal. Ask your boss for more time, more resources, more support, or less micro-management if you need that. If you want to know how you’re doing, ask that too. Ask your team how you can be more helpful to them, and ask them to help you where you need it. It works both ways there too.
Life
- Some questions aren’t for others – they’re for you. Do you want to go back to school? Travel the world? Join the Peace Corps? Move to California? Get married? Break up? Change careers? You won’t really know the answer to these questions and many more unless you ask yourself these questions, as hard as they may be. After all, you should know yourself better than anyone else, so in turn, to get what YOU really want, you need ask yourself the questions.
So, once more, with feeling: if you want something, ask for it!
Jenna Sauber 